10 psychological tricks that will appeal to people

This article can not only read, but also listen. If you prefer - turn on a podcast.

1. Copy demeanor interlocutor

During a call, use similar gestures and facial expressions, posture, repeat interlocutor. According to the study, this behavior accelerates the emergence of sympathyThe Chameleon Effect..

2. Spend more time with those with whom you want to start a relationship

We are more likely to like people who are familiar to us. Psychologists conducted an experimentExposure effects in the classroom: The development of affinity among students.Four girls, unknown to students attending classes at the university. Some came often, others rarely. Then the students showed their photos and were asked to say which they cause a lot of sympathy. It turned out those who are more commonly seen in the classroom.

3. praise interlocutor

People associate the adjectives that you tell them the praise, with your own character. This phenomenon is called spontaneous transfer qualitiesSpontaneous trait transference to familiar communications.

. It works the other way around: if you constantly speak out negatively about the person, what you say about him, begin to ascribe yourself.

4. Demonstrate positive emotions

We have strongly influenced mood others. Often we unconsciously feel the same emotions as the sourceEmotional Contagion.. To make a good impression, demonstrates a positive attitude.

5. Do not be afraid to seem imperfect

Demonstrating some obvious flaw or mistake, you show that you are not alien to anything human. Scientists discovered this by examining how errors affect sympathyThe effect of a pratfall on increasing interpersonal attractiveness.. The subjects listened to the recording of the quiz. If someone has correctly answered all the questions, but in the end accidentally spilled coffee, he liked it more than the one who was perfect.

6. Focus on common views

we reachThe prediction of interpersonal attraction. to the people, in something similar to us. This is called the attraction of similarity. And we particularly like the people with whom we have common negative traitsBeing Liked is More than Having a Good Personality..

7. Think of the interlocutor as he wants to be perceived

People want to be seen as they themselves see themselves. When the idea of ​​man is the same for usSelf-Verification Theory. with our own self-image, relations are developing successfully. We feel that we understand, and it is necessary to establish trust.

8. Share something personal

This will help build relationships and get to know the person. Start with general topics (eg, a movie you both recently watched) and gradually move on to more personal. Then tell something about themselves secret. So there a sense of intimacy, and the other party will be easier to trust you in the future.

9. Give the other person to talk about himself

Researchers from Harvard University foundDisclosing information about the self is intrinsically rewarding.That, speaking of himself, we feel pleasureComparable with the pleasure of food, money and sex. Therefore, let the other party to tell something about themselves. So he will remain a pleasant memory of your conversation.

10. Behave as if the source you like

When we consider that a person is good to us, and we ourselves begin to feel sympathy for him. This phenomenon is called reciprocal sympathyReciprocity of Liking..

In addition, we assume that people would react well to us, we behave towards them warmer. So we increase the chances to make a good impressionnterpersonal Warmth Explains the SelfFulfilling Prophecy of Anticipated Acceptance..

If you are not sure how the interlocutor applies to you, behave as if you like it. So it is likely to be sympathetic to you.