Why is it helpful to talk to strangers

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This improves the emotional state

We look away on public transport. At parties and meetings we prefer to chat with a few people who know well, without the risk of talking to someone new. After hearing from a neighbor, "Good morning!", We shudder and think that he needs something from us.

Conversations with strangers seem to us awkward and painful. Trying to make a conversation, we are afraid that we will reject, or we think that we have with that person has nothing to do. We advance convince ourselves that neither we, nor the kind of conversation he would not be interested.

"This phenomenon of multiple ignorance - said Julian Schroeder (Juliana Schroeder), a psychologist at the University of California at Berkeley. - You can see that no one is talking, and concludes that they do not want to talk, although more inclined to talk than they themselves believe. "

People mistakenly believe that the behavior of others depends on their views, whereas it is actually justified by social norms.

Julian Schroeder

All this does not allow us to make contact with strangers, so we choose solitude. But such a choice is not always correct. According to a study Schroeder, communication with strangers is more positive emotions than privacyMistakenly seeking solitude..

The researchers studied the emotional state of people in public transport. Those who are under the instruction I struck up a conversation with fellow travelers in public transport or a taxi driver pointed out a positive impression about the trip than those who had to sit in silence. The researchers wanted to see if the positive effect extends to those with whom you spoke. To do this, they recreated conditions of the waiting room. The results showed that positive emotions experienced and the one who started the conversation, and the one who spoke.

Another group of participants were asked to simply imagine such a conversation. They themselves expect that the experience will be negative, but the experiment confirmed the opposite.

We underscore the importance of social ties, believing that privacy nicer than chat with a stranger. But there is a positive emotional effect and to communicate with strangers.

Julian Schroeder

This is true for unfamiliar peopleSocial Interactions and Well-Being.. Among them, for example, a barista at your favorite coffee shop, those who visit with you some yoga, or the one who walks with the dog in the same place as you. Regular interaction with these strangers promotes social and emotional well-being. For these relations are characterized by less frequent contact, low emotional intensity and limited proximity.

"Sincere communication, even minimal, helps to meet basic human needs belong to a group, - says Gillian Sendstorm (Gillian Sandstrom), a psychologist from Essex University. - Talking with a stranger gives a sense of what you see and recognize a sense of community with them will remind you of your communion with all men. "

This is good for the brain

According to another studyFriends (and Sometimes Enemies) With Cognitive Benefits.Even a brief interaction with someone increases the executive functions of the brainExecutive Functions.. This mental processes that enable us to concentrate, plan, prioritize and organize.

Participants were divided into three groups. Some met and within 10 minutes were friendly conversation. others asked betAnd others do not communicate with each other. Then, all participants underwent cognitive tests, employs the executive functions of the brain. The first group showed better results.

Every day we have plenty of opportunities to chat with strangers: in public transport on the way to work, at lunchtime, at the meetings and parties. Try to enter it into a habit. To start a conversation, just smile and look the person in the eye. The main thing - to try to get in touch sincerely.

See also:

• How to win a stranger from the first seconds of communication →
• 5 experiments that will teach you to talk to strangers →
• 10 books that will help to pump skills →