3 painless ways to expand your circle of acquaintances

Usually we deal with those who are similar to ourselves. But a wide circle of acquaintances can be very useful: according to sociologists, people are more likely to find a new work not through close friends and spouses, and through a friend who had met only a few times in life.

1. Change something in a familiar routine

Imagine a typical day. Most likely, you go from home to work the same way, climb the same ladder. During the day you dine in the same place, you go in the same toilet. After work, you look in the same shops. All this becomes like a stop in the schedule of the train. As a result, every day you see the same people.

Try to break this cycle. Go to the restroom on another floor, buy a coffee in a cafe the other, leave the car in a different place. So you can meet new people.

In addition, we are constantly automatically "filter the" people. As soon as we meet someone, we immediately decide, "you are interesting," or "you're not interesting," "you are important" or "you are not important."

Remember who you know is you feel the least interesting, and try to establish contact. tie conversation or offer a cup of coffee together. Think about where to go or what to do to get to know the people you are usually filtered out. So you also expand your social circle.

2. Do not turn in on themselves

Under stress we do narrow down your social circleStatus Differences in the Cognitive Activation of Social Networks. , We close and see its features. We just do not want to make contact with people. How can overcome this?

Scroll through the list of their friends on social networks. For sure you will notice the names that do not immediately come to your mind when you find yourself in difficult situation. Write to these people.

In addition, it is important to remind yourself of your strengths and your values. We often shrug off the boards near and listen to the advice of unfamiliar peopleTainted Knowledge vs. Tempting Knowledge: People Avoid Knowledge from Internal Rivals and Seek Knowledge from External Rivals. Because they do not feel to them and do not feel envy on their part to the threat. But when we remind ourselves of their abilities and positive attributes, we have easier to reach out to those who seemed to threaten us.

3. Beyond simple "thank you" and "please"

Remember the last time you helped a colleague. What do you say in response to the appreciation, but "please" or "not at all"? You missed a good opportunity to expand your social circle. A well-known psychologist and author Robert Cialdini advises after "please" add: "I know you would have done the same for me."

This works in the opposite direction.

When someone has helped you, do not just say "thank you", adding: "Let me know if you need my help."

Such phrases are helping to strengthen relationship with other people, expressing your respect and a willingness to continue the dialogue.

Think about how you can be helpful to this person now or in the future. Pay attention not only to what you can get from others, but also the fact that you can give them. This will help to broaden and deepen their ties.