Why do so many women obsessed with marriage and what to do

Why do so many women eager to marry

Thoughts about the wedding have put the head in childhood

Girls are brought up not like boys. First taught that happiness and success are directly related to the welfare of the family and marriage. In boys, the critical connection between happiness and no marriage.

Mother and grandmother at an early age we are told: "That you grow up and get married." This phrase is deposited in the head, and there is a belief that marriage is really necessary.

Society imposes stereotypes

If a woman is married, then it is normal. If her husband is not, then there's something wrong. Public pressure makes women feel inferior. When the age is close to 30, it becomes even tougher: the parents require grandchildren, grandparents - grandchildren, girlfriend with a ring on the ring finger tells about the virtues

family life and hint that you would have to go.

Nothing to do but listen to this opinion and think: "Is not it I really time to get married?"

The woman did not understand their own needs and can not satisfy them

"Persistence in the search for a partner is often dictated by the fact that women can not live in the fun, do not know how to understand and meet the desires and needs, and often - even the age of 30 - they are still immature personality "- says family psychologist Larisa Milov.

The partner they are looking for not just a partner in life, and who will take care of them, take care of and will fill the void that can not close themselves.

Why do I need to get rid of intrusive thoughts about marriage

You deters man

Vehement desire to marry does not attract men, but only deters. They do not install, it just needs to be done, so it is accepted. Therefore, not only do you torment yourself, but also contributes to the overall situation.

You risk to choose the wrong partner

You want to connect his life with any particular person? Or you yourself is more important than the fact of marriage: a stamp in the passport, white dress and beautiful ceremony, and who will be her husband - is secondary?

Obsession with marriage leads to the fact that a woman does not choose a worthy partner, and lacking that give, not listening to their feelings and emotions. As a result of these relationships are complex and often unsatisfactory destroyed.

Larisa Milov

Because of this painful and can be formed toxic relations. loneliness and fear of censure from society overshadows common sense, but a woman desperately clinging to a man who, perhaps, did not like. Just because a marriage is becoming more important than the relationship itself.

How to cease to want to marry

Find out the cause of his desire

Ask yourself why you really want to get married, and honestly answer this question.

Here there are some interesting things: a husband is often presented as the savior of an empty "false" life. He will bring new experiences, color life emotions, warm the winter evenings. In short, shut up the hole that comes through. Woman, radiating "save me from myself," has high chances to attract not one of whom dreams.

Olga Poluektova

Perhaps because all the friends are already married and you do not? Or relatives bother to question: "When is the wedding," or because you want to become better in the eyes of others, because the status of the wife is respected?

Wedding - the continuation of a healthy and strong relationship. This should be an informed decision, but go on about the family or to escape to the registrar, because so it is accepted, it is dangerous and fraught with imminent divorce.

Learn to live in harmony with each other

You need to enjoy life and feel happy no matter ones you or with someone else.

There is a proven and highly reliable way to stop want to marry. It helps all but given easy, and not everyone comes to an end. So, to stop crazy to want to get married, you need to take and take their lives.

Larisa Milov

It is important to really learn how to be happy and not to rush to extremes to get away from the problem. Live here and now: to learn something new, to change jobs more interesting, if you want, get hobby. Look for the pros alone and understand that a full life is possible even without marriage.

Stop idealizing marriage

If the partner does not bore you in her arms before the wedding, it is unlikely that he will do so after. And the case of the wedding is the first and the last. Becoming a wife, you do not start at the click of your fingers to cook the most delicious cakes for my husband, if able to do this before. You can always learn, before or after the wedding, but the stamp in the passport is not affected. In addition, marriage does not guarantee happiness and long life together.

Remember friends, acquaintances and parents. How many examples of happy marriages will count? With love, mutual respect and support? It will be apparent that in itself does not make a happier presence of her husband.

Olga Poluektova

Marriage will not change anything, if you already have a relationship Problems. And it does not promise you a serene life. You will receive a new status, become a family, but the problems that have fallen out of an unmarried life, will stay with you. Maybe the first time you will stay in the euphoria, but it will pass. And the phrase "Now you just have to do it, because you're my husband" does not work.

Admit to yourself that you scared

Psychologist Olga Poluketova proposes to create new rules for "happy self". Write them on the points and a start only to their own needs. It is difficult to move away from the old order and to go against public opinion, but you have to learn to denote personal boundaries. And admit that you're scared and that's fine.