Polyamory: answers to key questions about non-monogamous love
Relations / / December 19, 2019
What is polyamory
To indicate that there are different definitions of the term, but in general it can be described as follows.
polyamory - is an interest or being in an intimate relationship (emotional and / or sexual) with more than one person with the consent of, openness and awareness about it.
and could not find Have you ever been in love with two people at the same time one? If yes, then you know what I mean.
What is the difference between the polyamory and betrayal
In the first place, that all the people involved in such a relationship, consciously agree to them. Nobody violates the agreements, do not lie and do not hide.
Poliamornye healthy relationships are generally characterized by mutual respect and openness between the parties.
At the same time, partners can set certain boundaries and enter into agreements. Violation will harm relations as well as cheating in a monogamous union.
What are the relations poliamornye
- V - this Latin letter to a situation when one person meets the other two are not related by any relationship between them. By analogy with the V shape may be N and W - writing letters as it hints at a number of partners, although interpretations vary occasionally.
- Triangle - three people who meet each other.
- Square - Four people who are in a relationship. Often, but not necessarily, in the "square" take two separate pairs.
- Group - more than four partners who are in a relationship with each other.
- Open marriages or relationships - a pair, both members of which separately meet with other people.
- Solo - the person who meets with a few people, but it does not emit the leading relationship and does not seek to live together with one or all of its partners.
- hierarchical polyamory - the reverse of the previous situation: a person identifies the "primary" relationship (they can be characterized by a high level of intimacy, living together, the total budget), and "secondary". The "secondary" partner is not necessarily less important, but takes up less space in the everyday life of another.
Of course, all conventional classification: the people who make the rules and the format of their relationship. The main thing is to talk about it all the same place. As long as you do not discuss with a partner, in what is the relationship are, you can not fully be in them sure.
What about jealousy?
One of the myths about polyamory: in such a relationship is not jealousy. Of course, it arises, although not all and not always.
For example, can be jealous of one of the partners, fearing that the new man would overshadow him and because of that old feelings fade. In this situation, the main thing - do not start to establish new rules and deal with jealousy, understand its causes and find a way rectify the situation.
If jealousy and frustration are constant, it can mean that a person does not fit an open relationship, at least at this stage of life. Although the cause may be psychological problems.
In any case, the jealousy - a sense peculiar to many people. And if it appears, it is not necessary to be afraid of it - you need to explore it.
How do you know what suits you polyamory
There are many reasons why people are attracted to open relations. Here are some of them.
- The person experiences a deep feeling or passion for a few people at a time and wants to freely express these feelings.
- man allows relations develop naturally, without limiting their scope is too restrictive.
- Having multiple partners for a man as fine as a close friendship with several people.
- Man seeks to experience the different types of romantic and sexual relationships and understands that one partner can not satisfy all his desires.
- Man wants to expand existing relationships, but does not want to cheat a partner.
- A person simply thinks, "This is cool!" When I first heard about polyamory.
If you've read this far and you think that all that is written for you, wonderful - go for it! If you do not know how to relate to read, also good. Absolutely normal to experience uncertainty and even fear, thinking about polyamory as a new turn in their lives - still turn this rather abrupt. Think, weigh all, do not rush: there are plenty of stops on the way from the "rigid monogamy" to "anything."
If you are sure that polyamory is not exactly for you, and that's fine. The main thing is communicated to a partner that they agree only to an exclusive relationship.
Finally, if you realize that poliamorny, but are in a monogamous union, again, the best way - to talk with your partner. Explain to him that you can not be happy in a closed relationship, and let them know that the reason why only you, but not in it.
And the last thing: do not compare. Be monogamous - not to be jealous and closed and be poliamornym - does not mean to be more open, enlightened and free. It's just the format of relations, which can be acceptable and unacceptable in any particular case. The choice is always is yours.
- 5 kinds of relationships for those who are not suitable monogamy
- A pair of every creature: Why Monogamy won and that's good
- Aromantiki and tsifroseksualy 10 sexual orientations, which you did not know