How not to lose friends and make new
Relations / / December 19, 2019
If you regularly refuses to meet and cancel joint plans, the friendship will come to naught or does not start up.
Many would like to have been close friends, but is not ready to make for this effort. How often do we meet someone interesting and thought we could be friends. But things, fatigue or simply too lazy to make us endure the meeting. The weeks and months to come, and we did not move forward on a superficial acquaintance.
Of course, you can not be friends with everyone he met. It is not necessary. But if you want to have a close friendship, but constantly find reasons not to go to a meeting, it's time to change tactics. Author of publication Vox Jackie Luo (Jackie Luo) offers universal tips.
1. Break the ice
Talk to people, which feels sympathy or respectThat they are of interest to you and you would like to chat with them. If they do not share your interest, do not worry. But do not miss the opportunity to get to know someone just because you are afraid of seem too intrusive.
2. Do not be afraid to be vulnerable
Talk about their problems and ask people about their difficulties. Not found only in bars and coffee shops, invite friends to their home. Give thoughtful gifts. For friendship is important that you accept each other as they are. But this is impossible if you never show your weaknesses.
3. Learn to say "no" to those who do not want to pay attention to
It sounds cruel, but it will save time and effort and you and another person. Depict a friendship with someone without sincere feelings - this is not a manifestation of kindness. So do not promise to meet later on. You both have a limited amount of time. It is better to spend it on the really important people.
4. reciprocate
If your friend is always the first to offer the plans, the next time invite him somewhere themselves. If you need to cancel an appointment, to offer each time. And make an effort to hold back a new agreement.
5. Keep important for you people
Sometimes friends need your physical presence, sometimes - just emotional support. You can always find other things to do and responsibilities. But if you regularly make a choice in favor of them, not friends from of friendship soon there will be nothing. To save her, try to have both sides.
Close friendship arises not just when you have a lot to do, or you would like to communicate. And when in some situations, you give preference to another. How many times do you need to cancel gatherings or miss important events in his life, so that your friendship has come to naught? Much less than you think.
Therefore, the next time you have to decide to take the time to a friend or do something else, remember that this choice will affect your relationship.
see also
- 3 ways to make more friends →
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